start of a long week

today is the start of my pre-chemo week. i have to undergo some tests before the start of the chemo sessions. i was advised to take good care of myself, eat the right foods to build up strength and to stay away from people with colds or flu. 

i’ve also decided to visit my barber before the first session so i could have my hair shaved. a good friend told me this could save me from the agony of seeing my hair falling in shocking proportions during the course of the treatment. thanks doctor jessica! 🙂

i was told that i will initially undergo 6 sessions on combination chemo (meaning two or more drugs will be given at the same time). the doctors were very honest in telling me that the goal of my treatment is not to cure the cancer but only to control it. chemo might lessen the cancer cell’s progression and might prevent it from spreading to other vital organs and also to relieve me with the pain that goes with the disease.

since i’m just about to start with chemo, i was told that i may need to stay at the hospital for 1-2 days so that the medicine’s effects can be watched closely and any needed changes can be made. the frequency of the treatment will be once a week. i was advised though that i will be given rest periods to give my body a chance to build healthy new cells  and for me to regain my strength.

i have to admit, i’m scared. there were so many negative thoughts in my head, so many what ifs, so many questions. but then GOD made me see that this is an opportunity for HIM to show His great love for me. and all that i need to do is to simply trust Him, after all, He is control. i know He will be there for me throughout this journey and He knows what’s best for me. His plans are perfect, His ways are higher and His love endures forever.

and my heart is singing this song at the moment:

Life can be so good
Life can be so hard
Never knowing what each day
Will bring to where you are
Sometimes I forget
And sometimes I can’t see
That whatever comes my way
You’ll be with me

My life is in Your hands
My heart is in Your keeping
I’m never without hope
Not when my future is with You

My life is in Your hands
And though I may not see clearly
I will lift my voice and sing
Cause Your love does amazing things
Lord, I know, my life is in Your hands

Nothing is for sure
Nothing is for keeps
All I know is that Your love
Will live eternally
So I will find my way,
And I will find my peace
Knowing that You’ll meet my every need

My life is in Your hands
My heart is in Your keeping
I’m never without hope
Not when my future is with You

My life is in Your hands
And though I may not see clearly
I will lift my voice and sing
Cause Your love does amazing things
Lord, I know, my life is in Your hands

When I’m at my weakest point
You carry me
Then I become my strongest Lord
In Your hands

My life is in Your hands
And though I may not see clearly
I will lift my voice and sing
Cause Your love does amazing things
Lord, I know, my life is in Your hands
I trust You Lord
My life is in Your hands

                      -Kathy Troccoli, My Life is In Your Hands

Please pray for me. Thanks.

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